Dan and his future 'EX' wife!!

LMAOOOOO!!

Happy Birthday Bob!!

Hope this will be the BEST Birthday Evah fer ya Baaaaaaaab!!!

Huh??

NOONE IS SAFE, I TELL YA!!

My Bud Norma is gonna kick my ass!! Lmaoooooooooo...

HOW DO YA LIKE ME NOW!!!

I gots a new weight loss program... Anyone interested???

G'pa...

A small boy was lost at a large shopping mall..

He approached a uniform policeman and said, " I've lost my grandpa"

The cop asked, " What's he like?"

The little boy replied, " Budweiser and women with big boobs"....

BELATED HAPPY BIRTHDAY AYE!!

Sure wanted this up on your Birthday but blogger wasn't allowing THAT to happen.. 8-16...
THANKS for the heads up Aye... Obviously it worked!!
I hope your Birthday was all you expected it to be and MORE!!

WTF2!!

Well...
Blogger is letting me d/l images too but is not showing them...GET YOUR SHIT TOGETHER BLOGGER!!!

DAD...buddy2_shoes2006

This is a man I've known on the net for many years... I call him 'Dad'... :(
Dad went to the Dr. Tuesday and found there was shadows on his liver... He found out yesterday those shadows are a rare form of cancer on his liver... He has a long row to hoe and arrangements are being made to set him up with an Oncologist...
My heart is full of such sadness... This man has many many friends on the internet... He has helped me and always been very supportive of me... I just lost another long time friend that was my age, last week to Cancer...
Anyone who knows me knows how I feel about that C word...
I have in the past had the opportunity to meet Dad personally and I am a better person for it...
Dad sent me this card today and I just can't keep it to myself... I want you to know, I LOVE YOU DAD...ALWAYS HAVE....ALWAYS WILL...

INSPIRING THOUGHTS...

Anger is a condition in which the tongue works faster than the mind....

You can't change the past, but you can ruin the present by worrying over the future...

Love.... and you shall be loved...

God always gives His best to those who leave the choice with Him...

All people smile in the same language...

A hug is a great gift...One size fits all...It can be given for any occasion and it's easy to exchange...

Everyone needs to be loved... Especially when they do not deserve it...

The real measure of a man's wealth is what he has invested in eternity....

Laughter is God's sunshine...

Everyone has beauty but not everyone sees it...

It's important for parents to live the same things they teach...

Thank God for what you have...Trust God for what you need...

If you fill your heart with regrets of yesterday and the worries of tomorrow, you have no today to be thankful for...

Man looks at outward appearance but the Lord looks within....

The choice you make today will usually affect tomorrow...

Take time to laugh, for it is the music of the soul....

If anyone speaks badly of you, live so noone will believe it...

Patience is the ability to idle your motor when you feel like stripping your gears...

Love is strengthened by working through conflicts together...

The best thing parents can do for their children is to love each other...

Harsh words don't break bones but they do break hearts....

To get out of a difficulty, one must usually go through it...

We usually take for granted the things we should be giving thanks for...

Love is the only thing that can be divided without being diminished...

Happiness is enhanced by others but does not depend on others....

For every minute you are angry with someone you lose 60 seconds of happiness you can never get back...

Do what you can, for who you can, with what you have and where you are....

WISHING YOUR DAY BE FILLED WITH PEACE AND LOVE....

Thank you from the bottom of my heart Dad.... I can't imagine my life without you in it....I LOVE YOU...

WHAT A COINCIDENCE!!

A chicken farmer went to a local bar, sat next to a woman, and ordered a glass of champagne.
The woman perks up and says, "How about that? I just ordered a glass of champagne, too!"
"What a coincidence," he said, "This is a special day for me. I'm celebrating."
"This is a special day for me, too, and I'm also celebrating!", says the woman.
"What a coincidence," says the man.
As they clinked glasses he asked, "What are you celebrating?" "My husband and I have been trying to have a child, and today my gynecologist told me I'm pregnant!"
"What a coincidence," says the man. "I'm a chicken farmer. For years all my hens were infertile, but today they're finally laying fertilized eggs."
"That's great!" says the woman, "How did your chickens become fertile?"
"I switched cocks," he replied.
She smiled and said, "What a coincidence!"

Damned The Hot Baths!!

Driving...

Two elderly women were out driving in a large car, both could barely see over the dashboard.

As they were cruising along, they came to an intersection.
The stoplight was red, but they just went on through.

The woman in the passenger seat thought to herself "I must be losing it. I could have sworn we just went through a red light."

After a few more minutes, they came to another intersection and the light was red again.
Again, they went right through.
The woman in the passenger seat was almost sure that the light had been red but was really concerned that she was losing it. ! ; She was getting nervous.

At the next intersection, sure enough, the light was red and they went on through.
So, she,turned to the other woman and said, "Mildred, do you know that we just ran through three red lights in a row?
You could have killed us both!"

Mildred turned to her and said, "Crap, am I driving?"

Last Geico Commercial!!

Ivy....

I LOVE this garage... Shot it once before but realized my side view mirror was in the pic...
Since then, most everytime I drove by one of the gates has been open or a trash can was out there... I FINALLY caught it! Guess I can deal with the newspaper...

What, What??

There's nothing worse than a Doctor's Receptionist who insists you tell her what is wrong with you in a room full of other patients. I know most of us have experienced this, and I love the way this old guy handled it.

An 86 year old man walked into a crowded waiting room and approached the desk.... The Receptionist said, "Yes sir, what are you seeing the Doctor for today?"

"There's something wrong with my dick", he replied. The Receptionist became irritated and said, "You shouldn't come into a crowded waiting room and say things like that."

"Why not? You asked me what was wrong and I told you," he said.

The Receptionist replied; "Now you've caused some embarrassment in this room full of people. You should have said there is something wrong with your ear or something, and discussed the problem further with the Doctor in private."

The man replied, "You shouldn't ask people questions in a room full of strangers, if the answer could embarrass anyone.

The man walked out, waited several minutes and then re-entered. The Receptionist smiled smugly and asked, "Yes??" "There's something wrong with my ear", he stated.


The Receptionist nodded approvingly and smiled, knowing he had taken her advice. "And what is wrong with your ear, Sir??"

"I can't piss out of it," he replied.

The waiting room erupted in laughter.

Senior Driving...

As a senior citizen was driving down the freeway, his car phone rang.

Answering, he heard his wife's voice urgently warning him, "Herman, I just heard on the news that there's a car going the wrong way on Interstate 77. Please be careful!"
"Hell," said Herman, "It's not just one car. It's hundreds of them!"

Casual Friday...

How's this, 'Mr. Rither'?? LMMFAO!!

My Beloved Sister

Today, while I sit in my rocking chair to rest..
Reminiscing the time that I loved the best,
In my vision I can once more see,
My precious beloved sister and me...

The house is still there - no noise anymore,
No one to pick on, no wrestling on the floor,
No heavy footsteps, no laughter or glee,
My beloved sister's voice no longer calling me...

The time of happiness that only our family knows, Before the impending moment that maturity grows.
I am just reminiscing - She has gone to the Lord now.
Since then - my dark hair has turned gray above the brow.

Many years of our life were spent apart, My sister to a new nest did part...
Something went amiss one sad day..
When my beloved sister left to go far away...

I may have some pleasures and leisure from care,
But willingly, some of my possessions I'd gladly share...

If only my beloved sister I could hold near,
For one cherishing moment of that long ago year....

Happy Birthday Sharon... I Love You .. I Miss You

FAMILY...

Three sisters ages 92, 94 and 96 live in a house together.
One night the 96 year old draws a bath.
She puts her foot in and pauses.

She yells to the other sisters, "Was I getting in or out of the bath?"
The 94 year old yells back, "I don't know. I'll come up and see."
She starts up the stairs and pauses. "Was I going up the stairs or down?"

The 92 year old is sitting at the kitchen table having tea listening to her sisters.
She shakes her head and says, "I sure hope I never get that forgetful," as she knocked on her wooden table for good measure.

" She then yells, "I'll come up and help both of you as soon as I see who' s at the door." LMMFAO!!!